I’m going to write down everything bad that’s happened in the last 36 hours, and in the end most of it isn’t going to sound so awful.

1.  Yesterday I got drummed out of bed at 8 so that the hostel cleaning people could inexplicably clean the dorm.  Checkout time isn’t till 10, and none of us in that dorm were checking out yesterday.  In the ensuing confusion, the cleaning staff got all up in my personal belongings while I went off to brush my teeth.

2.  The previously discussed, on facebook, theft of my flip flops.  I’m pretty sure this was a misunderstanding, since I think the reason we got an 8am wakeup call is that the cleaning staff was told we were checking out, but really we were all being moved. Except they didn’t tell us we were all being moved, either.  This is the main sketchy thing about staying in big youth hostels as opposed to the little family run guesthouses I’ve mainly been staying in.  Anyway, the staff probably thought I’d left for good and forgotten my sandals, thus making them fair game.

3.  I got like 2 hours of sleep last night thank to inconsiderate (and LOUD) Israeli backpackers.  And, yes, I’m going there.  The Israeli kids were definitely the ones to blame.  Also, the first rule of dormitory style hostels is DON’T PACK ALL YOUR SHIT IN PLASTIC BAGS.  They are loud and irritating to your fellow travelers.

4.  When I paid up to check out of the hostel, they didn’t have any change.  Change is one of my big pet peeves here in Peru.  I mean, I get that most Peruvians live life in very small sums.  And when I do something outside the tourist infrastructure, I make sure to have small bills or preferably exact change.  But there is no excuse for a hostel, where comparatively large amounts of cash are changing hands on a daily basis, not to have change.  If my bill comes to 84 soles, I should be able to pay with a s/100 bill.  And if you really don’t have change, that’s your problem.  I’m on vacation, with plenty of time to stand around while you go find my 16 soles.

5.  Chinchero.  Oy fucking vey.  More on this tomorrow, probably, as I have spent a really depressing amount of time on the internet today.

6.  Worst cheese sandwich ever.  How can you mess up a fricking cheese sandwich?  Cheese.  Bread.  Done.  Leave it to the only restaurant in Chinchero, though.

7.  Attempting to flee Chinchero, I got conned out of 30 soles.  I know it’s only $10, but still.  Getting scammed sucks.  Especially when you know exactly what’s going on, but you lack the language skills to assert yourself.

8.  I was then so frustrated on leaving Chinchero that I broke every nail on my right hand down to the quick trying to get into a colectivo out of that shitshow of a town.

9.  I arrived in Ollantaytambo only to discover that pretty much my entire online identity pertaining to this trip has been hacked, and there’s not much I can do about it for the time being. 

10.  I then spent the rest of the afternoon doing quick saves of potentially insecure online information.

11.  After all my running around today, there are no travel agencies in either Chinchero or Ollantaytambo that do tours to either of the two remaining Inca sights I want to see.  I could, however, have arranged exactly what I wanted (plus mountain bikes!) from my hostel in Cusco.

12.  Which means I’m not going to get to see the things I wanted to see, AND I’m spending the next 3 days here in Ollantaytambo for no reason.

13.  I actually can’t think of a 13th thing, to be honest.